Jealous...

 

I found myself having a hard time feeling like I needed to let go of jealousy with a particular person in my life. Then I realized I didn't need to get rid of it, but dig deeper into what that feeling was trying to tell me. And it was FEAR... fear that I would never have what they seem to have right now. That I will always be left without - that special someone that would love me. A relationship to share my vulnerability, my laughter, my tears, my children, my hopes and dreams. Someone to chat with about life and love, that person to feel accepted and genuinely cared about. The jealousy has not left me yet, so I will give it a safe place to be for now without judgement or labels and love myself until...

A day of love...

While doing a food demo yesterday, somedays the times goes by slow and sometimes fast. Yesterday was a very slow day, so I usually use it to people watch or write things down that I need to work on. What I notices yesterday was a lot of love, from grandparents enjoying their grandkids, parents being patient and loving with their children, couples young and old holding hands and just lots of good cheer! It left me feeling like there really is a lot of love in the world, happy people loving each other, parents genuinely enjoying being with their children. At times my world is small and though it is filled with all those things, I don't see a whole mass of interacting with a large group like that. So it was nice... to watch a " day of love" go by me one person at a time!