Movie...

 

Tonight I rested and did what my body needed. I eat dinner, put my pajamas on, got ready for bed and watched a movie. I watched "If I Stay" and I really like the way it was done. It could have been a really really sad movie but the focus was on the love and the people that made up their life, not the death. It wasn't overly dramatic or sappy, just a really well-done movie... I enjoyed the rest and entertainment!

Difference...

 

As I was sitting at a stoplight this afternoon I glanced over and saw all kinds of stuff by the curb. Discarded cigarette butts, bottle caps, torn paper, etc. It got me to thinking about how we each DO make a difference in this world. We each have a choice in each present moment to litter or not. It's a small choice but one that impacts our world.

Do-Over...

Feeling out of sorts today. I didn't eat very well, I didn't do any of my usual routines and I got into bed late. But I'm not going to worry too much about it because tomorrow is another day and I can just start over ~ I'm grateful for my do-over!

Victory...

Since I was a young teen I have always loved loved loved puzzles. I can remember growing up always having a puzzle laid out somewhere and working on it after school and on weekends. But as my life progressed to children and animals, there never seemed to be the time or a space to have a puzzle sitting around. So it feels like a small victory to have found a way to have a puzzle out ( children are older now) while avoiding my four cats losing all my pieces. So I am very excited, but now the hard part begins... learning to step away from the puzzle!!! I could sit there all day and night playing and enjoying. I'm just so glad to have that "joy" back in my life!

FLOW....

My word this year is... FLOW! Yes - flow with an exclamation mark! I have spent most of my life resisting what is and not allowing for fear of the unknown. But this past year working in an art journal has really helped me walk into the unknown a little more willing and a little less resistant. So that is why I picked the word flow. I want the unknown to flow freely in and out of my life. I want "all" to pass through my life with our judgment or labels and just let it be and - F....L....O....W.................................................

Cup of Tea...

 

I've never been a coffee drinker, but I do love the smell of all the yummy flavors they make. Tea is my comfort place. It offers comfort over and over again in my life and I'm always grateful for that warm embrace it brings.

Decision...

"My decision-making skills closely resemble that of a squirrel when crossing the street."

I had to laugh when I read this because this is how I feel so often especially lately when trying to decide what baby blanket to make for my granddaughter. But I have this trouble with trying to decide on presents for people too, even if it's something I'm making. I've always frustrated myself with this issue. But at least I can laugh at myself and that's progress.

Ritual...

 

In the last couple of months, I've made it a ritual to light a candle each time I take time to honor my creative muse. It feels like a pause before I begin to make something that I don't know what it will be, but that I'm willing to show up and let the process speak to me.

Park...

 

A nice day outside plus time plus my daughter up earlier than expected equals a walk in a new park. We decided to find something that wasn't too far from home but we wanted to find somewhere new to explore. We found a park that didn't have a lot of wooded trails but it did have a really nice open trail that my daughter felt more comfortable to go jogging on some time. Then it was time to head home to make breakfast for dinner... Yummy!

Voice...

"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow."

Mary Anne Radmacher

I could relate to that little voice at the end of the day that say's, " I'll try again tomorrow." It's that small step you don't always manage each day but you keep showing up and trying again!

Rhythm...

 

 ...In the relentless busyness of modern life, we have lost the rhythm between work and rest.

All life requires a rhythm of rest. There is rhythm in our waking activity and the body's need for sleep. There is a rhythm in the way day dissolves into night, and night into morning. there is a rhythm as the active growth of spring and summer is quieted by the necessary dormancy of fall and winter. There is a tidal rhythm, a deep eternal conversation between the land and the great sea. In our bodies, the heart perceptibly rests after each life-giving beat; the lungs rest between the exhale and the inhale.

excerpt from the book: Sabbath - Restoring the Sacred Rhythm of Rest 

By: Wayne Muller

Pooh...

 

 "How do you spell 'love'?"

~ Piglet

"You don't spell it, you feel it."

~ Pooh

My children loved Winnie the Pooh when they were very young. I think I have every tape there was and we watched them all ~ over and over and over again. I loved them too and I can't wait till I can watch them again with my sweet sweet sweet granddaughter!

Ripple...

 

"Know that your kindness has a ripple effect in the universe."

That's all I wanted to say...

Plates...

I'm not sure what is going on with me in my kitchen, but this past year and the start of the new year, I have broken more of my dishes than I ever have in my entire life. It's been a frustration because I used those baking dishes a lot and the plates and bowls were some of my favorite. Whatever it is, maybe I'm just to let it go. I know I can't do anything about it but I get upset with myself because it keeps happening and it's driving me crazy. So I am just going to let go and start collecting mismatched plates and dishes when I can - I like that idea!

Kitchen...

 

My middle son has taken a liken to being in the kitchen, whether it's baking or cooking. He has become very helpful when I'm cooking dinner, he'll come in and work on part of it while I'm working on another part of dinner. One evening I knew I was going to be home late, so I asked him to fix a meal he knew how to fix for him and his sister and I would eat when I got home. Boy was that nice... I walked in the door, took my coat off and dinner only had to be warmed up and it was ready. A girl could get use to that!!! But it's really nice to to have him participate making the meals and just hang out together, gathering more tips and ideas for thing he wants to make.

Jealous...

 

I found myself having a hard time feeling like I needed to let go of jealousy with a particular person in my life. Then I realized I didn't need to get rid of it, but dig deeper into what that feeling was trying to tell me. And it was FEAR... fear that I would never have what they seem to have right now. That I will always be left without - that special someone that would love me. A relationship to share my vulnerability, my laughter, my tears, my children, my hopes and dreams. Someone to chat with about life and love, that person to feel accepted and genuinely cared about. The jealousy has not left me yet, so I will give it a safe place to be for now without judgement or labels and love myself until...

A Memory...

  "I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."

Maya Angelou

    When I was reviewing my memories and there are a lot that is missing and a lot that has made an impact, but the one that kept resurfacing was a neighbor I had named Mr. Roach. I lived in Cleveland Ohio at the time and I was somewhere between the ages of 8 and 10. He lived a couple house down from ours and it was such a wonderful place to be. My mother didn't bother me about going over there and it was never what he did or said but I remember how he made me feel. Those years we lived in that house were rough for me. I don't think rougher than later years but it felt like it because of how young I was. I remember wanting/trying to take my life at one time. I don't need to relive those memories, but Mr. Roach was a light in my darkness. He was just a kind older man, guessing probably around 70 or 80 years old. When your young the old look at lot older than when you view them through the eyes of aging.
     He always had a stash of mallow cups that he shared and would listen to and tell me stories of his life. He had a sense of humor too. Once he told me the story of how he took his glass eye out when someone told him to keep his eye on the ball ( he was playing pool in his youth) and then he described their reaction. Most of all I remember his loving-kindness, not for anything particular he said or did, but His presence in my life I have never forgotten. In my later years when things were not really any better at home, I always wished I had a Mr. Roach to just hang out with, but I never had that kind of experience again in my childhood. So it is a treasure that I hold in my heart and it drives me to provide that same feeling to children whether my own or not... I hope they always remember how I made them feel!

Book...

This book " Women Who Run With the Wolves" had come in to my life many many times over the years through conversations, offers of the book and others that had read it and mentioned it to me. So once again this book has presented itself to me... so I'm listening and starting to read...  it is time!

Drink...

 " The human spirit needs places where nature has not been rearranged by the hand of man."

This is what happens when my soul gets lost in everyday... building, cars, businesses, highways, schedules. I need to find that space where nature is pure and untouched. Where it is free to grow wild and allows me to breath in it's essence and beauty that I often loose site of. It teaches me to let go and just be one with all that is. To once again drink in mother natures peace...

Story...

 

 "Description begins in the writer's imagination. But should finish in the readers."

Stephen King

I've noticed as I've chosen to show up for my creativity each and everyday that the fiction book that has laid dormant in my mind, has begun to surface. The pages speak to me, wanting to be written and set free. I find it interesting that when I've allowed my creativity to have a higher priority in my life, creativity continues to flow, even all that was buried deep within. It feels good to be thinking about my story again, it has been with me for about 15 years. I've kept it captive and locked away... a place that felt safe. But through my art journal, I'm learning to walk with the unknown present moment by present moment. Allowing it to flow even when I don't know what I will meet when I arrive.

Years...

 

I have this habit of holding on to the last little bit of somethings, afraid I won't have anymore. I'm not sure if it was from my growing up years of not having much in material things and then in a marriage where money went down the drain like water. But this hand soap in the picture a friend gave me at least five years ago and the little bag of herbs for putting in your bath a friend gave me about that long ago. So my goal this past year was to actually use and enjoy them and know when they were gone that other good things will come into my life. I'm proud to say the soap is almost empty and I have one bag left to use in my bath water. It feels okay, like I will have enough of what I need and want in my life without having to hold on, thinking that somehow if I don't use that last little bit I'll always have it. I do that with other things in my life too and have worked to release in order to expect more good things.

Woke up...

The first thing my brain did when I woke up this morning was start comparing myself to others. This person was doing this, that person was achieving this, and my self critic started filling my mind with negative talk. I tried not to let it throw me off for the whole day. I allowed the voices to be there and while choosing to ignore them, I struggled on and off and worked on things I "had" to do but also on things that make me smile. So by the end of the day I was feeling better... and had stopped comparing.

A Plan...

 

 "You don't always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breath, trust, let go and see what happens."

This is hard for me. I'm such a planner and want/need to know all the details and I'm sure it gives me some sense of feeling like I have control. But I find myself wanting more of this in my life - to... breath... trust... let go... and see what happens. This is a present moment by present moment challenge, but with each moment that passes I hope I will get a little better at it!

Sitting...

 

Today was about sitting with a friend who needed comfort. She is grieving and just wanted some familiar company to help her mind think of something besides the powerless situation she is in. We spent hours with small talk, and quiet space, after thirty plus years of knowing each other that is enough. I brought her something to nourish her body and left having nourished her spirit... all in all a good day!

No Where...

Today was a day of rest for me. I did somethings around the house but mostly just did things I enjoyed. I read my book, I worked on my art journal, I slept in late, I worked on my health food blog, and most of all I went no where. That was the greatest thing of all!!!!

Winter...

 

While I was out and about walking dogs, I decided to enjoy winter's beauty and I snapped a few pictures.

Happy New Year...

My all your present moments this new year ~ be filled with "love"